Where Ladybugs Roar

Confessions and Passions of a Compulsive Writer

Friday, November 13, 2009

Flashy Fiction Friday (catty chat, speed dating)

So, I only have two flash pieces this week but I may have extra next week. The Thursday Flashy person didn't post a prompt, so I think that's why there isn't a prompt for Friday either. I can either get my trousers in a twist or go into a corner and cry... or I can just wait patiently and tack it onto next week.

I say this every Friday, but I also employ sarcasm sometimes and there is no sarcasm font, so this might be why you're not all running to the site. Flashy Fiction is awesome. Go there. Now. They post a prompt. You think about it. Flash on a brilliant work of literary fiction. Write it up in ten to twenty minutes. Praises galore. Instant gratification of being a success. Ego rises above the dismal swamp of rejected queries. Yay! Plus, it's good practice. Deb, Walt, and Girl with One Eye (GwOE for future reference because I'm lazy) all post there.

Okay, here are my pieces for this week:


I stared at the cat. "Did you just talk?"

It stared back. "No."


I stared at the cat. "Did you just talk?"

It stared ba
ck. "No."

No, of course it hadn't. Wait. "Are you trying to trick me into thinking you're not a talking cat?" I asked the gray tabby. I couldn't believe I was even having this conversat

"No," it said again. That creaky voice sounded familiar, and the cat's mouth hadn't moved.

"I'm going to go eat all the lemon cookies, do you want some?" I asked.

"Staaay Awaaay from the lemon cookies! They're not yoooours," it moaned. I saw a tuft of gray hair peek above the back of the couch, slightly above th
e cat's perch.

"Okay, kids, who switched Grandma's
meds out with tic tacs again???!!!" I shouted behind me. "You know how weird she gets when you do that!"



I hate speed dating. Why did I let Kendra talk me into it again?

Oh look. Here is my date for the next fifteen minutes. He looks like he just got out of prison.

"My name is Doug," he says, sitting down.

"Amy," I reply with a frozen smile. He's date number six.

Meanwhile, Kendra is at the next table with the guy who I assumed was a mortician and unable to smile, and he's laughing his stupid head off. He'd yawned while talking to me and looked at his watch six times.

I hate speed dating. My fake smile is starting to hurt my cheeks.

"Here are some break the ice questions," I say, holding up the sheet I'd been given in case a date isn't going well. It's true that it's too early to call on this guy, but I have a hunch.

Doug leans forward, saying, "Look. Let's cut to the chase. You want me. I want you. You can try on all these other guys but none of them will make smoke come out your ears as you scream their name...if you know what I mean. Let's just exchange phone numbers, and we'll skip this talking crap."

I look at the break the ice questions and answer them in my head on Doug's behalf. No. As black as my soul. No. A naked lady on my bicep. Yes. An STD. OH YEAH. Smashing beer cans with my head. Seven.

"Alright, Doug," I say, writing down Kendra's cell phone number on a napkin. "Sometimes I like to play hard to get--just to keep it interesting."

"I can't wait. I like the hunt." He fakes a bite in the air, and for a moment--I almost feel guilty.

Then, another round of laughter breaks out from the mortician, and Kendra puts her arm around him, giggling.

"Let me give you my work number too," I add with my first real smile.


  1. LOVE that last line! I'm rolling over here. :) Great job!!

  2. Okay, it is unforgivable that those girls forgot their prompts!! *scowl*
    In Heather's defense, her family is visiting. Enough said.
    In Suzanne's defense, she's probably editing.
    But, this is very unlike them.

    I am pondering over my prompt for tomorrow. I hope I can live up to your expectations, oh worshiper of the Frosting.

  3. It is completely unforgivable! We won't forgive them for at least another day or so!!! It's outrageous!!!

  4. I love them both but the speed dating is sheer genius.

    I lurk at flashy fiction now. One day I'll work up the nerve to post something, you know it's only a matter of time.

  5. I love how dedicated you are to flashy, Wendy. I must start doing them!

  6. Yep. You should both visit there. Woo woo! It's fun.